Walk away: Importance of self respect


There comes from time to time certain toxic people who let you down far low in your own conscience and breaks you down from within. If you have had spent many nights sleepless feeling utter guilt, hatred, disgust over an activity of a single person who most probably doesn't even remember it, then you know what I am talking about. Self respect is a very crucial tool for surviving in this busy world but sometimes it falls apart when you are attached too much with a person who mostly is somebody skillful at the art of exploiting you. Sometimes, the person can be genuine too, maybe its just that you two don't get along well. Whatever may be the reason, its time you should just seriously think about your friendship rather than obsessing over few incidents which seem to you far more disturbing that it really is. Because overthinking it can hamper your confidence in living your life.

I believe that confidence and happiness are intrinsically connected. The happier you are, the more confident you feel and the more confident you are, the happier you become. So, anybody or anything which puts down your self confidence should be scrutinized heavily. There is no harm in expecting someone you are close with to respect you especially when you don't miss out on giving it. Silently going through embarrassing insults or mean statements or deliberate negligence  continuously for long serves you no good. And the worst part that most of the times, after going through all of it for so long can fade out the confidence inside you to pick yourself up and walk away!


"Toxic" people can be anyone from your online friend to your long term project partner who is utter slacker with no sense of shame to someone you consider "close friend". You realize that now you don't need anymore "sorries" and that hurting you has become a frequent occurrence of him whether knowingly or unknowingly. If you are trying to change him, you should realize that maybe you are fighting with his very quality. Just because he/she can go along well with somebody else, doesn't mean that can happen with you as well. Everybody is unique, they have their own frequencies which may or may not be compatible and its OKAY if it is not. You don't have to be such a saintly person from whom everybody gets impressed and for the record even saints are hated at!

It should be noted that I am not talking about small misunderstandings which are a regular affair in most relationships. There is nothing wrong with them and most of the times, they even act as a way to understand each other better. But they get sort out quickly and are never repeated. Instead, I am talking about someone you probably have already guessed due to whom you have suffered for long enough that it is time where you don't need anymore drama. Its the highest point of annoyance when you no longer feel anger or hatred towards the person, you just want him/her to disappear as if he was never there. You don't want to harm him physically or emotionally, you just want separation.

When it happens, the ideal response is something very very few are capable of, and that is to start cutting off that person gradually and gracefully and filling the space with some other friend while simultaneously behaving perfectly normal and thus avoiding unnecessary drama of "sorry" or rants. No more eyes are wet, no more nights are sleepless, no inbox is filled, the transition is smooth, the friendship falls apart. All by itself. If you have suffered for too long and with too much intensity, may be you cannot do this. Then, the second option and I urge you to do it is- Walk away.

It's true that whenever we talk about any "person" as such, it is not the entire being himself, but the ideas or concepts we make about them in our head, the recollection of memories of us together and we MAY make a mistake in perceiving others and it is still OKAY if that's the case. We cannot and should not be a perfect human being, we have to be just somebody who cares about oneself and seeks little more happiness than what is currently, after all that's what life is about, isn't it? So why bother bearing the burden, why bother trying to know whether you are right or wrong? Simply suck it and Walk away!


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